Sometimes I just need to hit the reset button.
I am learning that life is about getting off track and then getting back on again. Its the journey right? The path? There are so many metaphors and stories about the paths we take in life, yet when I get knocked off mine, I throw a fit. Am I ever really knocked off...... or do I see a fairy darting behind a bush and chase off after it?
Making life so serious has been my toughest challenge to over come. Wanting to get it right and perfect has always been my ultimate goal. Knowing that part of life is accepting mistakes, defects and failures... I do that with perfection. Accepting the joys, bliss's and ecstasies are the grandest of fun on this journey, yet I still do that with a serious perfection. I am serious about having fun.
Until I get burnt out from all the rules and and expectations. Thats when the fairy shows up.
Its only then after following the fairy into the bushes that I see another path. Not a right path or a more blissful path... just a different path. A path of magic. A path also of illusion. The deeper you go into that path the more you wonder if the path you veered from was real or not? Some paths maybe, are only meant to be acknowledged, not followed.
I had to reset my shitty attitude day with a great movie and some snuggling with my most beautiful teenage daughter... I got to get them in now before she turns 20 and grimaces when I hug her. Like my day I recently reset my entire life. I got lost on that fairy path of magic and illusions.
I love that fairy path. Its a path away from all the responsibilities of being a single mom. A full time Landscaper. An entrepreneur building her own business. A woman in recovery of an over addictive mind. A student. And simply.... a woman. The path of the feminine fae is full of glory and fun. A path where I can let my hair down and be free to laugh and laugh and laugh.
Sometimes I need a distraction.
Why cant I laugh on My path? Where did I lose my joy? It was there.... a while back. I remember my meditations being of an ecstatic nature. I am reminded of my passions for learning the mind. Learning how my addictive mind works and the hypnosis of others. Memory floods me now of a tanned more toned body and a deep love for being outside and of service to others. And I did laugh and laugh and laugh with my girls.
How did I get so wound tight? Well whatever the reason I am entirely grateful for that little fairy that caught my clouded attention and lead me off path and into a realm of illusion. It is only from seeing through beer goggles that I now remember my joy and passion for this wonderful path I am journeying on. Leave it to a fun and playful guide to distract me in the knowing that it would get me back on track!!
You know I was once told.... Don't take life so seriously, no one gets out alive! I think I will listen.
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